There was a time when doing absolutely nothing was completely normal.
We didn’t call it self-care.
We didn’t call it a digital detox.
We didn’t schedule it into our calendars.
We didn’t make a TikTok about it.
Sometimes there was just nothing to do.
And somehow, that was okay.
If you grew up in the 90s, you probably remember saying the two words every parent dreaded hearing:
“I’m bored.”
And the response usually wasn’t, “Here, let me give you unlimited entertainment.”
It was more like:
“Go find something to do.”
So we’d wander around the house. We’d stare out the window. We’d flip through the same TV channels. We’d lie on the floor listening to music. We’d doodle. We’d play with something we’d forgotten about. We’d sit outside.
Sometimes we’d eventually find something to do.
Sometimes we didn’t.
But here’s what I find interesting:
Why does doing nothing feel so much harder now?
In the 90s, Boredom Was Just Part of Life
There wasn’t always something available to entertain us.
Sure, we had TV.
But you had to watch whatever was actually on.
Your favorite show might not come on until 8 PM.
Missed it?
Too bad.
Maybe you’d catch the rerun.
We had video games, but they weren’t sitting in our pockets everywhere we went.
We had the internet eventually, but it wasn’t an endless stream of short videos, notifications, messages, news, opinions, and entertainment.
Sometimes you genuinely ran out of things to do.
And boredom wasn’t treated like an emergency.
It was just Tuesday.
Now We Can Fill Every Second
Think about the last time you stood in line somewhere.
Did you just stand there?
Or did you pull out your phone?
Waiting for your food?
Phone.
Commercial break?
Phone.
Sitting in the doctor’s office?
Phone.
Can’t fall asleep?
Phone.
Five minutes before leaving for work?
Might as well scroll.
We’ve reached a point where even tiny gaps in our day can immediately be filled.
There’s always another video.
Another post.
Another notification.
Another article.
Another show.
Another game.
Another thing somebody somewhere thinks we need to know.
We’ve become really good at eliminating boredom.
But maybe we eliminated something our brains actually needed.
Then Productivity Entered the Chat
Entertainment isn’t the only thing competing for our attention.
There’s also the pressure to be productive.
Especially as adults.
If you’re sitting around doing nothing, there’s probably something you could be doing.
Laundry.
Cleaning.
Working out.
Meal prepping.
Answering emails.
Learning a new skill.
Updating your resume.
Working on your side hustle.
Organizing your house.
Working on yourself.
Planning your future.
And for creators?
Oh boy.
You could be making content.
Writing another post.
Designing something.
Editing a video.
Updating your website.
Growing your social media.
Creating another income stream.
Suddenly, an empty afternoon doesn’t feel peaceful.
It feels like you’re wasting time.
When Did Every Hobby Need to Become a Side Hustle?
This one might be especially familiar to millennials.
You enjoy drawing?
You should sell your art.
You crochet?
Open an Etsy shop!
You like photography?
You could make money doing that.
You enjoy writing?
Start a blog.
You like making videos?
Start a YouTube channel.
You bake?
You should sell those.
Sometimes those suggestions are exciting.
There’s nothing wrong with turning something you love into income.
But there’s also something wonderful about doing something that goes absolutely nowhere.
Making a terrible painting nobody sees.
Crocheting something wonky.
Taking photographs you’ll never post.
Writing something you’ll never publish.
Playing a game without streaming it.
Watching a movie without reviewing it.
Having a hobby that stays a hobby.
Not everything you enjoy needs to become productive.
Even Self-Care Became Productive
This might be the funniest part.
We somehow turned relaxing into another thing we’re supposed to accomplish.
Drink eight glasses of water.
Journal.
Meditate.
Exercise.
Take your vitamins.
Do your skincare.
Read ten pages.
Practice gratitude.
Get enough sleep.
Hit your step goal.
Self-care can absolutely include those things.
But sometimes I don’t want another checklist.
Sometimes self-care looks like lying on the couch watching something I’ve already seen twenty times.
Sometimes it’s sitting outside.
Sometimes it’s staring at the ceiling.
Sometimes it’s taking a nap.
Sometimes it’s doing absolutely nothing.
And I don’t think we should have to turn that into an achievement either.
We Used to Know How to Waste Time
Remember those random summer afternoons?
No plans.
No school.
Maybe your friends weren’t around.
There was nothing good on TV.
So you just… existed.
Maybe you rode your bike around.
Maybe you drew.
Maybe you rearranged your bedroom.
Maybe you listened to the radio hoping your favorite song came on.
Maybe you stared at clouds.
Maybe you sat on the porch.
Maybe you complained about being bored for three straight hours.
None of it needed to accomplish anything.
You weren’t thinking:
Am I using this afternoon effectively?
You were just living it.
Maybe Boredom Wasn’t the Problem
When we’re bored, our minds have somewhere to wander.
We daydream.
We notice things.
We think.
We imagine.
We create.
We process what’s been happening.
Sometimes we even discover what we actually feel like doing.
That’s different from constantly being handed something to look at.
When every quiet second is filled with scrolling, streaming, notifications, podcasts, music, news, and other people’s thoughts, there’s not much room left for our own.
Maybe boredom wasn’t something we needed to eliminate.
Maybe we just forgot how to experience it.
Why Do We Feel Guilty Now?
I don’t think there’s one simple answer.
We live in a world that constantly reminds us there’s something else we could be doing.
Social media shows us people working harder.
Doing more.
Making more money.
Traveling more.
Exercising more.
Building businesses.
Renovating houses.
Starting side hustles.
Getting promoted.
Having babies.
Buying homes.
Somebody somewhere always appears to be doing more than you.
So sitting on your couch at 2 PM doing absolutely nothing can suddenly feel like you’re falling behind.
But here’s the thing:
Life isn’t a productivity contest.
You don’t have to justify every hour of your existence.
Let’s Bring Back Pointless Afternoons
I think 90s kids should reclaim something from our childhood.
The pointless afternoon.
An afternoon with no goal.
No optimization.
No pressure to make memories.
No pressure to photograph it.
No pressure to post it.
No pressure to improve yourself.
Put your phone somewhere else.
Turn on an old movie.
Listen to an album from beginning to end.
Sit outside.
Doodle.
Do a puzzle.
Take a nap.
Stare out the window.
Daydream.
Get bored.
And don’t immediately try to fix the boredom.
See what happens.
A 90s Kid Reminder
You don’t need to earn an afternoon on the couch.
You don’t need to monetize every hobby.
You don’t need to turn rest into another self-improvement project.
You don’t need to fill every quiet moment with your phone.
You don’t need to be productive simply because you have free time.
And you definitely don’t need to feel guilty because you spent an afternoon doing absolutely nothing.
We did it all the time in the 90s.
We just didn’t have a name for it.
We called it being bored.
And maybe being a little bored again wouldn’t be such a bad thing.